Couples Counseling

couples_counselingPeople in commitment tend to think that they can easily leave their current relationship and find another partner that does not create the same problems. But in reality, the problems that they are experiencing in their current relationship will continue into the next relationship if left untreated. USA Today reports that 76% of divorcees do not remarry. One of the primary reasons for this is that people recognize the previous problems early in a new relationship and do not understand why they are attracting the same type of partners. Because the “how to” do things properly are missing, the same issues arise in their next relationship.

Couples counseling is your opportunity to learn about love, relationship and to find out how to change your relationship into a loving and intimate union of two people. There have been many books written to try and explain how to build a good relationship. And though they are helpful, they are not specific to any one particular relationship. Each relationship is very unique and must be analyzed by a professional who knows about all aspects of a working relationship to find where your relationship is not functioning and is causing disharmony for you. When couples are in disharmony they:

  • Fight often without resolution
  • Distance themselves from each other
  • Do not have quality sexual relations
  • Are unable to feel safe in their own homes
  • Are too tired and feel lonely
  • Stop complimenting each other
  • Yell and argue with the children
  • Resort to violence

In couples counseling, a therapist does not take sides. There are always three truths in a relationship: her truth, his truth and then there is the truth. The truth is the “relationship”. And it is the relationship that needs to be repaired. This is why it takes a professional to help repair a relationship. Couples tend to see their own individual sides and not the side of the other and how those two sides mingle together. It is the coming together of the two people that is not working. Therefore, a good therapist is able to sort out the damage and help the couple to work together, without giving up their own truth along the way. A good therapist is one who:

  • Does not take sides
  • Is direct in instruction
  • Does not allow the fighting to continue in session
  • Recognizes what is the relationship issue and what are the individual issues
  • Sees the truth without emotional entanglement
  • Can talk about sex freely and openly
  • Points out successes and attributes that the couple cannot see for themselves
  • Can combine couples and individual therapy to maximize results and save money

Successful couples therapy and counseling can:

  • Allow sex to be more satisfying and more frequent
  • Bring peace to all members of the family
  • Regain security
  • Shorten disagreements and provide resolution
  • Bring laughter and spontaneity
  • Let everyone be themselves without fear

So my question to you is: Can you really afford not to work on this relationship? Do you want to be doing the same things, and saying the same things, and being in the same type of relationship for the rest of your life? You can make this relationship what you want it to be. The choice is yours.

41690 Enterprise Circle North, Suite 216, Temecula, California 92590 - Phone (951) 551-4484
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Providing Individual Counseling, Couples Counseling, Sex Therapy and Family Counseling in Temecula.